life

I find drunk people just so interesting.
The way they invade your personal space.
Basically it gets me hard.
And oh,the way they spit at you when talking and it always lands in the corner of your mouth.
Ooh give me more.
Please,please drunk fuck.Repeat yourself just one more time
and if you`re a girl,
walk as slowly down the street making yourself oh so obvious to all the wankers just so ready to throw punchs at your ever so grateful chaperone.
Gosh,i`ve just come........

This is an old blog entry i just found on Myspace.It made me smile.

Do the world a favour,be our drummer.

This statement.
About doing the world a favour.
I think that's fair enough.
Coz don't we all know that cool kids love Wonk unit.
hahahahaha.
Actually i'm not sure that kool kids are allowed to like Wonk unit yet.
They were in San Diego last year.
But that was because we didn't have a drum kit or amps so we used a bin instead and just plain Di'd the guitars.
That was kool.
Yup.
We impressed the hell out of the kool sharks there in the Soda room.
I loved that show
and i loved the cool crowd too.
Big up the kool crowd.
And yourself.
Good.
Does anyone out there fancy playing drums for us?
I mean,there's some pretty heavy bait here,know what i'm saying.
You get to sit next to Kool Cat alex and his wonderful loving persona.
And Tommy.
He is dark and swarthy.
He is nice too.
We are like men.
But kind men.
Don't think we'll mollycoddle you in any funny way though.
We are men remember.
Tall dark firm men.
Men who've done their time on the road.
Men who've walked life the long way round.
Yeah.
Heterosexual men.
Mmmmmmmmmmm
Yeah
you like that.
But if you were a homosexual drummer then that would be cool too.
Possibly even cooler?
Wow.
We would actually join the cool skool if we had a gay drummer!!!
Brilliant.
Ok,you don't have to be gay to join wonk unit but if might help.
hahahahahaha
Or a girl drummer?
That bird from the Carpenters could play some mean funk that's for sure.
Ok enough's enough.
I started this bulletin uninspired.
And now i an happy because a few minutes later,i have laughed out loud and felt the creative juices stirred for the 1st time in a while.
I will put this on my blog.
cementyoucunt@blogspot.com
and i guess i'll also put it on Fuckbook.
Yes i meant Facebook but hate it.
Ok.
errrrrrrr oh yeah right.
Drummers.
this is the deal.
Touring pretty much starts in March.
1st the Uk then mainland Europe(east side) in June.
We'll almost certainly head out to the West coast of America at some stage this year and Japan keeps taunting us.
Have you seen Lost in Translation?
Oh my fuckin God!!!
That Scarlet bird is fuckin amazing with that pink hair wig.
Did all us men not fair fall in love with that piece of fine american ass?
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
That was me going Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh.
I guess i was trying to explain my love for her.
and i don't care what anyone says yeah,her and Bill Murrey got it on at the end and lived happilly ever after and everything was good.
Thankyou.

Alex