HOW TO MAKE GIRLS CUM 2012-WHAT WE DO WANT THOUGH

We love the smell of pussy.
We like it on our face and fingers when we leave in the morning.
The smell of vagina is the smell of sex.
And i tell you what,you get that more from a hairy cunt too!
You know your pussy.Keep her clean but don’t worry about too fresh.
Maybe shower in the morning then do a seriously hot sweaty workout in the afternoon.
That musky smuthole of yours will be driving us mad all through dinner!
The musky pussy is the dogs bollox!
At least in the dating stage.
If intercourse does seem on the cards though a piece of advice.
Give her a quick work out beforehand in the bathroom with a couple of salivary fingers.
Seriously,this’ll remove any embarrassing bits and freshen her up too!
Quick,to the bathroom!

HOW TO MAKE GIRLS CUM 2012-KNOW YOUR VAGINA

Men love vaginas.
We can put our cocks in them if you let us.
Real men don’t care if you have hair or not?
We don’t give a shit.
We like the smell,
We like the taste,
We like your piss flaps,
We like to twang them.
We’d like to gargle with them if they were long enough!
we like your assholes
we would like to put our heads up your fannies if they would fit.
Fuck porn.
Fuck that sterile pink bullshit.
When we pull down them knickers for the first time (And let me just say,we don’t give a fuck about your knickers either) you basically own us.
We are facing the best thing in the world.
A fresh vagina.
There is no better high in the world than making friends with Siobhan for the first time.

'HOW TO MAKE GIRLS CUM 2012"-THE "BEST" FRIEND.

So your girl has a "best friend"?
He happens to be a guy?
How very unfortunate for you.
Don't kid yourself,your instincts are correct.
He is in love with her.
I'm telling ya,unless he is an ex boyfriend and the relationship had run it's course,99 percent of the time this will be straight up truth.
He will eventually break and confess his love to her.
What's worse,she knows but will deny it till she's blue in the face coz she's a cunt.
You'll argue over this man every other week.
When his confession finally occurs,she'll be outraged,
she'll feel "so betrayed".
But your victorious "i told you so"will be short lived.
Your smug gloating smashed in it's face when in retaliation she tells you that she actually fucked the bastard a few months before you arrived on the scene.
Isn't that wonderful.
I weep just writing this.
Rule 1,
never trust her "best friend" if he is a man.
But these fuckers aint actually men though,
they shall be known as "sniffers".
Best tell them to fuck off early before they cause inevitable problems for you later on!

"HOW TO MAKE GIRLS CUM 2012"-FURTHER NOTES ON ALCOHOL.

Alcohol is fun.
It loosens the tongue and the knickers.
And the ass.
And the brain.
I loved alcohol so much that it totally fucking destroyed me.
But that is because i am an alcoholic.
Luckilly for you though,not everyone has it in them to be an alcoholic.
Phew! Where were we?
Yes.
White wine.
Women's fighting juice.
I'm telling ya,Chicks and white wine don't mix.
Think of all those fights you've had.
Well the chances are that if drink has been drunk and fights have then been fought then the magic ingredient to really start the party'll be a nice chilled glass or bottle of chardonnay.
Why am i telling you about this?
Well my friends,getting laid and making girls cum has gotta start somewhere and this'll be the dating stage.
So when you are in Pizza Express and the tasty Italian waitress is taking the drinks order,beware the woman that orders the white.
She is mad.
And if she isn't now,she will be in half an hour.
Does make for a crazy fuck though but it'll be like walking the tightrope.
juggling her madness with your lust.
And a reminder,drunk girls take longer.
But then again,what do you care,
You've been knocking em back all night anyway.
Hooray.
I am just jealous.
Jealous of drunken sex and wild abandon.
I weep into my tepid water.
Not really,drunks are boring as fuck!
x

GOD WHAT ARE YOUZ LOT LIKE!

LADIES.
I DO LOVE READING 50 SHADES OF GREY FROM OVER YOUR SHOULDER
ON THE MORNING RUSH HOUR COMMUTE.
YOUR KINDLES DON'T FOOL ME.
I ESPECIALLY LIKE IT WHEN YOU TWIG.
REGISTER YOUR GUILTY SECRET DISCOVERED.
EXPOSED,
HOT BETWEEN THE THIGHS,
NOT SURE WHERE TO LOOK,
TO PROCEED OR SHUT THE BOOK.
LADIES READING OLD SKOOL PORN IN THE MORN IN PUBLIC!
YES MATE!
NOW THAT IS PRETTY COOL!